• jdfkehoe

Ponderings From the Path - Transformation

Updated: Jun 7

5-22-22

Reaching for Resource and Resonance

I am contemplating transformation today as I am experiencing stress, anxiety and fear of the future. Can I feel it and make space for it. Can I trust life enough to let go of trying to define, control and fix my current experience. Can I, instead, allow calmness, peace and trust to naturally emerge. The image of swinging on a trapeze as a child comes to mind; that sense of freedom, enjoyment and engagement with life.


I grew up with cultural narrative that “the good guys” defeating the “bad guys” will lead to the happy ending we all seeking and create peace and security for all. I developed the idea that if I am triggered, angry, stressed, uncomfortable, etc., I need to find out if I,they or the situation are to blame, attack the “wrong” party and use control to fix the problem. I grew up believing that destroying what is bad and wrong within me is the path to redemption.


I had an “aha” moment applying Albert Einstein’s statement that “energy cannot be created or destroyed; it can only be changed from one form to another” to this narrative. I realized that the belief that one “side” destroying and obliterating the other “side”, destruction and killing (whether global war or self destruction) does not obliterate a threat or perceived threat, it simply creates a false sense of safety and security. The only true security and balance comes through transformation of unbalanced energy.


Up until recently, I have had the idea that healthy relationships are constantly harmonious as depicted in books and movies. I strived for happiness and peace, rainbows roses all the time. I believed that a successful life is one filled only with eternal bliss and optimal wealth.


In fact the fluctuation between pain and growth, peace and celebration is our natural state. I recently learned that, contrary to common belief that a constant steady heartbeat is our goal, data reveals that low heart rate variability has been shown to be a predictor of cardiac death. Healthy heart rates are variable. Seasons change; life has ebbs and flows; we experience birth and death. It is the balance of resource and challenge that supports homeostasis, not the absence of challenge or stress. We need creative tension to move and grow and learn. We are tasked with facing challenges, reaching for resource, finding the balance within in order to be a catalyst for that balance in the world around us.


Einstein expressed another essential truth, “no problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it”. Metamorphosis requires that we stretch beyond what we currently know and experience to make room for growth and change. We do not transform by adopting beliefs and opinions already formed, following actions and paths already laid by others, no matter how widely accepted or well trodden. If we keep thinking and doing what is known and comfortable, we will keep getting the same results.


An invaluable resource is access to diverse knowledge and experience. Webs of connections have been strengthened as people all over the world faced the pandemic together, connected and communicated. Our increased ability to use technology facilitated greater access to global wisdom and experience. With a clear vision of what we are reaching to accomplish, willingness to receive feedback from within and without and ability to assess without bias the effectiveness or ineffectiveness of our thoughts and actions we can move forward together. The skills, commitment and dedication we all bring to the table are immeasurably valuable.


I am now striving to reach beyond my current understanding and experience in order to break free of old patterns and to generate forward motion on my path. Open minded curiosity and a willingness to surrender self doubt are essential. I am recovering child like wonder and playful collaboration with all life. I am experiencing increased ability to bring life into balance more quickly. I hope to inspire and enrich all life beginning with myself. (Cue the music…”let there be peace on earth and let it begin with me…”)


Speaking of music, I am reminded of a conversation I had with my mother who was a very gifted musician (and scientist). I asked if her dislike of certain music was because it was dissonant. She said no, music without dissonance is flat and empty. Her objection was to music that is solely dissonant with no resolution. The beauty in great compositions, she said, is in the resolving of dissonance in order to reach resonance. This is the path of transformation I am traveling.


Thus we are called to transform. We are urged to transmute our current patterns of thinking and ways of being. We need to be willing to surrender current reality, trust life and leave the comfort of the cocoon. We are called to spread our wings, express our unique gifts and celebrate the sun, fresh air and world around us.


Here are some helpful tips I have stumbled upon so far with the help of teachers and fellow travelers on this expedition.

1. STOP and ASSESS: What am I feeling in my body and cells? What am I experiencing emotionally

2. BREATHE: Take deep breaths. Focus on breathing

3. GROUND: Connect to myself. Feel myself rooted to the planet.

Some grounding processes to explore: listen to Music, get out in Nature, breathe fresh air, smell the flowers, feel the sunshine, engage in soothing tactile experience

4. REACH FOR RESOURCE: Connect with inner wisdom, support system

5. ENGAGE IN QUESTIONING

Approach with curiosity

Focus on physical and emotional experience in the moment

Surrender ideas, opinions and stories that arise

Refocus on physical and emotional experience in the moment

Listen to thoughts that I,they or it should be different

Refocus on physical and emotional experience in the moment

Acknowledge past and current experience leading to triggering

Refocus on physical and emotional experience in the moment

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